So, a picture of someone or something that's had a big impact on me...Not really sure to be honest. A lot of things that have happened in my lifetime have had an impact on me, so I'm probably going to go with the biggest one I can think of.
Bullying. This is also the first time I've really openly talked about it, never mind broadcast it on the internet. Growing up I was never overly popular, but I got by, had my group of friends through primary school in Myddle and so on. Everything was fine, then we moved to Wales. What a fucking mistake. I've blocked out most of my memories of the three years we lived there, because it was hell. I went to two different primary schools in the space of a year, bullied for the common reasons, appearance and so on.
But then there was the extra twist, I was English, and everyone else was Welsh. So the evil little school children had another reason to make me feel more inadequate each day. Name calling turned into physical bullying in the playground, even in the classroom, which the teacher - who was also the head master, conveniently didn't notice. Only the NQT who helped out once or twice a week noticed, and informed my parents.
By then I was miserable, bruises covered my back, I'd spent all my break times and lunches in the changing rooms crying, avoiding the other kids so maybe I'd make it through the day without any embarrassment. The day my parents came in to see the NQT was the same day the head claimed non of his lovely students would treat another like that, it was also the day my sister told the big fat vicar that he wasn't God - and the day I was taken out of that school and enrolled in another.
Everything was fine for the rest of my primary education. Then I had to attend secondary school, with the same wankers who'd made me life hell just months before. Now, granted it wasn't as frequent as the bullying before. But it was worse, it was teenage bullying, the nasty, sly, spiteful kind. Being isolated on the bus, having people pretend to be my friends, just to go back to theirs and tell them things I'd said or done, also to get my mobile number, so they could ring me and shout abuse out of school hours. Then, my parents said we were moving to Chesterfield - Thank fuck.
Not to say that this didn't present its problems too, as I was a year 8 coming into a new school. At that time I was alternative, I wore baggy jeans with chains, had a skateboard and never wore make-up. So I got bullied in Hasland for a few months, until I settled and found some half decent people, then everything was okay. But one thing I will never forget is that because of the insecure, inbred wankers that made fun of the way I dressed, I stopped. I dressed like everyone else and that is probably one of my lowest points - because I conformed for someone like that.
Now, life story over. This had a big impact on me because it was the worst time of my life. But unlike so many others, I'm still here to tell the story. I came out of that time stronger, and I'm the person I am today because of that. The most amusing thing? The Welsh girls that made my life miserable have since tried adding me on facebook. Hilarious isn't it? One even sent me a message saying "Oh my God Lauren I can't believe it's you. You look so different now, you're really pretty." Sickening isn't it.
Yeah I have changed, and I've developed a decent punch as well - they better hope I don't run into them one day. I don't forget.
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